Although I haven’t received a formal diagnosis, anxiety is something I’ve dealt with for as long as I can remember. I think it’s something I’ll always deal with to some degree, but to a much lesser extent than I used to deal with. Today I wanted to share how I’ve figured out what helps me cope with it, prevent it, and keep it manageable.

how i cope with general anxiety

I’ll talk more specifically about morning/ nighttime anxiety below, but I want to start by addressing some general techniques I use when I feel anxious.

Ask myself why. When I start to feel anxious but I don’t know exactly why or what brought it about, I’ll ask myself why. I keep repeating it, kind of like a mantra, until I figure out what it is. Odds are, something happened (even if it was super subtle) to trigger it, and being able to identify the cause helps me take a step towards addressing the problem, for a lack of a better word. Sometimes I’ll discover that my anxiety was brought on by someone saying something in an ambiguous tone that I’m interpreting in a negative way, I feel overwhelmed by the task at hand, or I forgot to do something. Being able to pinpoint the source automatically reduces my anxiety.

Have routines. Creating and following set patterns to start and end my day grounds me. The day can take a poor turn or be non-stop, but I know that no matter what comes about, my day is going to start and end the same way. My routines are extremely simple; I never want them to take a lot of time or feel like an entire separate to do list. I also recommend having some sort of routine for when you finish work and transition into your personal time.

Move. Physical movement releases feel-good endorphins, and this is particularly helpful when my anxiety leaves me feeling stuck or so overwhelmed I don’t know where to start. Stretching, going for a quick walk, or even literally shaking it out changes the energy and I really do feel a difference, as cliche as it sounds.

Do one thing. Sometimes my anxiety causes me to freeze, so I try to just do one thing. whether that’s the smallest item on my to do list, cleaning a corner of my room, or spending 5 minutes on a nagging task that I’ve been procrastinating. Doing one thing swings momentum in a positive direction and even if that’s all I do today, I know I did something with forward momentum and that makes me feel better.

Engage your senses (and drink water). When I volunteered with a crisis line, we oftentimes suggested a mini-activity that engaged all five senses to try to ground you in a moment of anxiety. I don’t personally love that exact checklist, but I follow the overall idea. Light a candle, drink water, eat something, shower, feel fresh air on your skin - do something small to get out of your head and feel more physically present outside of your anxiety.

Release expectations. Not every day is the best day, and that’s ok. Some days I’m just going to feel more anxious than others, and on those days, I release expectations and try to take it easy, canceling what i can or moving a few things on my to do list to another day if possible.

how to cope with morning anxiety

Minimize my to do list. Waking up already feeling off is not a good feeling, and can make the rest of the day feel like an uphill battle. I’ll immediately go into problem-solving mode and try to move a few things to a different day. Not every day is my perfectly productive day and that’s ok.

Get outside (preferably in the sun).

Adjust music and external stimulus. If I’m not in a great headspace, I don’t need anything to make it worse. I make sure to only listen to calming music or a nature sounds playlist (I like the Rain Sounds, Floating Through Space, and Sweater Weather Instrumentals playlists on Spotify) and I’ll turn off my phone notifications. Less sounds and less interruptions help me stay focused on myself and provide a layer of protection against anything that will only make me feel worse.

If I can, take a mental health day.

how to cope with nighttime anxiety

Look at the moon. Super hippie-ish, but if I can, I’ll step outside and look at the moon and stars for a little perspective and quiet time away.

Do something mindless or distracting. I try to keep my mind occupied and off of making my anxiety worse, so I’ll read a book or put on a tv show I’ve already seen before.

Plan. Taking one step towards controlling what I can, I’ll plan out tomorrow, a fun weekend, or something to look forward to. If I can identify the source of my anxiety, I’ll try to make an action plan to feel like I’m taking some sort of control back from it.

Stay off my phone. To make sure I don’t find myself in a doomsday scroll and hopefully get myself to fall asleep sooner/ easier, I’ll put my phone away early.

tips for reducing anxiety

Audit music and tv choices. I used to gravitate towards metal music and crime shows (and still kind of do) but I did an inner voice reset a while back where I took a one week break from music, television, and movies and realized that even if violence doesn’t trigger me, music that focused on pain and problems led me to thinking about my similar experiences, and crime shows that had somber, sad tones weren’t helping my positive mindset, either. There are times when you want to listen to music that relates to your real-life experiences, but overall, I try to keep it a little lighter these days to help myself stick to a more positive mindset. Similarly, I do my best to avoid the 24/7 news cycle or overly dramatic reality tv.

Less podcasts. I love self-improvement, but there are times when motivational podcasts leave me feeling like I don’t measure up. There’s such a thing as too much advice, and when I feel like my anxiety revolves around feeling behind in life, comparison, focusing on my shortcomings, I take a break. This can also apply to social media if you find yourself scrolling too much.

Communicate. Something I really struggle with is ending things on a bad note with people; I hate going to bed frustrated with people, and it’s even worse if I think someone is upset with me. Everyone processes things in a different way and on a different timeline, but I try to find the balance by at least reaching a neutral place with people. Even if the other person isn’t ready to come to a resolution, it’s 100% worth my peace of mind to swallow my pride, make an effort, and own up to my side as soon as i can.

Socialize. I’m an introvert and a homebody by nature, but too much alone time leads to me spending too much time in my head. Taking the time to call a friend or even make small talk with a barista breaks up my thoughts and helps ground me.

Keep a note in my phone of my anxiety. This might sound ridiculous or like too much work, but what’s really helped me tackle my anxiety is learning more about it. Keeping a note in your phone might show you that you’re more prone to feeling anxious in the mornings, when your to do list is too long, when you interact with a particular person (even if you love them), or if you don’t get enough sleep. Figuring out the ebbs and flows of my anxiety has helped me avoid triggers and come up with steps to make it a lot more manageable.

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